A little history…I’m 28, divorced with two young kids, they live at home. He’s relatively attractive but not my usual type or taste. When there’s a rare exception to that rule, we call it love.
He is 37, divorced with one teenage kid that he sees every other weekend. I can’t figure out if I’m attracted to him or the fact that he’s a good guy. Calls, writes me letters, texts, takes me out, does family outings, asks about my day, washes my car, is clean, is fit, responsible, understanding, compliments me, etc, etc. We don’t get too much opportunity to spend alone time so we’ve only slept with each other twice. He’s completely fallen for me, thinks I’m strong, independent, beautiful, good mom, etc. Then the dilemma becomes do I let this great guy go and regret it afterward? As I see it, you’re asking a few separate questions here. You may be confounding to men, but you’re definitely not crazy and definitely not wrong…. We can break it down to its elemental components, but that thing that you feel, which draws you to a man? No more than the base attraction a man has to a woman when he sees her across a crowded room.
What she didn’t have – what I really needed at the time – was a backbone.
I just got the sense that I’d win every argument for the rest of our lives because she was such a pushover.
Let's not confuse this with Nice Guy Syndrome, that obnoxious thing where men complain that women overlook them in favor of assholes because they're just "too nice." (Actually, it's because they keep insisting on pointing this out. The ones I'm referring to are nice in a quiet way, not flashy or douchey or constantly "on" the way a lot of creative people are.
It's like holding the door for an old lady or rescuing a kitten from a tree and then screaming about it at the top of your lungs. A grown man who does his dishes, pays his own rent, calls his mom, doesn't have a carefully cultivated joke Twitter account and isn't in a noise band called Fingerbang is immensely attractive to me.
In movies, this archetype is consistently used as the pathetic foil of the turbulent, devil-may-care on-and-off boyfriend — the true love of the heroine's life.
The good-on-paper guy is meant to represent the wrong choice, the easy path, and a lifetime of blandness, and the poor guy gets left at the altar by Katherine Heigl as soon as Gerard Butler crashes through the church wall on his Harley, or whatever.
Click below to let us know you read this article, and wiki How will donate to World Possible on your behalf.With it, you will get exactly what you’re asking for. If that is your goal, keep pushing away the nice guys and letting the bad boys take their shots. I’d never criticise a woman for dumping a ‘nice’ guy.You’ll find them attractive, but they generally won’t want to stick around with a single mom who has all your responsibilities. I do however get a bit exacberated at all the women who claim that ‘i just want a nice guy.’ That kind of sentiment doesn’t do justice to yourself or the men who want to date you.I wrote about a man’s passion and proficiency just two weeks ago.In short, a guy doesn’t have to be a jerk to do well with women. And while I hate to keep on referencing old blog posts, some of them apply specifically to this theme, especially this one, which says: Let’s see… I think those two things are the essence of any relationship.